In the end, you will be just what you want to be. Justin Hayward
How to Stay Married – V in a Series
Looking for some ideas to keep your marriage alive and happy? This article will present more good ideas in our series for staying married and having a happy, loving marriage. Consider these points for a more meaningful, lasting marriage.
1. Be loyal. This principle is the basis of all good relationships. Use your time to compliment your spouse, not reveal their weaknesses. There is nothing more embarrassing at the company party for the spouse being criticized AND for the people being told, for a spouse to reveal some mistake, weakness of their partner, or something negative in their past. Most spouses don’t realize that their criticism of their spouse puts them in more of a negative light than what is being said about their partner!
2. Be honest. Wow, this is a principle we don’t see as often as we should. This shows truly who you are and what you are. If you are honest with your spouse and all your dealings, it shows your great character. This attribute is highly cherished and, unfortunately, not-so-often found these days. Admit your weaknesses to your spouse and “level” with each other. Go forth in coming days and resolve to do better and mean it. This can encompass everything from the wife telling her husband honestly how she spent money to the husband’s undesirable attraction to another person. Make a commitment to resolve the problem and correct your course. Marriage is so important; it is worth changing whatever you need to keep your relationship wonderful.
3. Be kind & considerate. It is so easy in our fast – paced world to forget to say thank you and please. It is easy to forget to make a phone call to check on how your spouse is feeling if you left for work and they were “under the weather.” Be sure to tell each other “I love you” during the day. When your spouse knows you are valuable to them by your kind acts; they are going to make different decisions when challenges and temptations face them through daily life.
4. Be courteous. Continue to open the car door and all doors, for your wife, pull her chair out at the restaurant, and walk beside her, not in front of her! Again, common courtesy goes a long way in a fast – moving world with lack of concern for everyone common around us. When you are going to a church meeting or family activity, husbands gain much by being the LAST one out of the home helping your wife and children into your vehicle. It is so frustrating for a husband (or wife) to be in the car sounding the horn when you are trying to get everything done and everyone in the car ready to leave.
Use uplifting and caring conversation. Compliment him / her when you can find even the little things they have done to please you. When spouses know their value from the way you treat them, you will reap the benefits of a loving relationship.
5. Be charitable. For some reason, it seems easier to be charitable to others over your family members. Be charitable with your time. If your spouse has “honey – dos” or wants help with a project or hobby, it will reap great benefits to take the time to help them and please them. You may not be receiving any benefit at the moment, but the rewards in the long run will be great.
6. Be humble. Arguments are usually over differing opinions. Opinions are not facts and opinions can change. The sooner you can bring opinions into agreement with each other, the faster you enjoy peace and love in your relationship. Try to see the view from your spouse’s eyes and acquiesce on your opinion. They feel loved when they can be “right” some of the time.
7. Be willing. Be willing to please. Follow the Platinum Rule. We hear about the Golden Rule a lot, but not as much about this rule. The Platinum Rule states, “do unto others as they would have you do unto them. If you want a new tv for the family room and your wife has that on the bottom of her priorities, then it is very good to give her something that is on the top of her list. Talk about it and come to a mutual agreement. If your favorite color is black and hers is red, then you would want to buy her the red car instead of the black one!
Life can be so much fun! It’s all in the way we look at things. Life goes by ever so quickly. After so many years pass and you are looking at the golden years of life, you wish many times you would have let all the trivial stuff go by the wayside! In the end, all that matters, is the sacrifices, dedication, and service you have given each other.
All the other foolish subjects you argued over give way to zero meaning. When so many things are said and done over the years, the only things you realize that matter are the facts that you are together and have one another, you are in good health, loving life, having new experiences together, and loving each other with all your heart! Enjoy today and everyday and concentrate on what matters. The relationship between you and your spouse!
Betty Gustin
Check out my other articles on “How to Stay Married
I, II, III & IV at Ezine.com under Author, Betty Gustin
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